Monday, September 27, 2010

ITT: We're College Freshmen from 2010.

BRB Getting thrown in jail for public urination after a party.
Seriously, this kid texted me at 2 a.m. asking me to bail him out. He was drunk and walking from a party to another, and decided it would be a great idea to relieve himself ON CAMPUS. A cop rolled by, and that was that.




BRB Spilling guts to police about drugs that had already been consumed.
Three guys were out at the local lake, after hours, smoking a joint. Having finished, one went off into the bushes to water them, while the others remained at the car. Campus Police rolled up and separated the two remaining. The first freshman denied their accusations about the weed, and asked to see evidence. The cops left him alone and went to the other one, who broke down and admitted that they had all been smoking.
I'm all for being polite to police officers... but that doesn't mean you admit to a crime without asking for evidence.

BRB Getting knocked up the first week of school.
Self explanatory. It happens EVERY year. I turned the same girl and her friend down for a threesome the first party I met her at. When freshman girls are offering those sorts of sexual trysts to upperclassmen the first party they meet, invariably the girl is just one of those.




BRB Thinking they can outsmoke/outdrink the fraternities.
So many freshmen walk into college with a chip on their shoulder. They want to look like bigdogs, and they look down on the upperclassmen. Especially since most of us don't party on the regular basis we used to (its why we are still here). At some point they come over for a small, private event, and nine-hours later pass out from shell-shock. I don't like to boast about my drinking/smoking, but now and again it feels good to put these kids in their place.

BRB causing drama.
Girl dated a guy until her other boyfriend, that the guy didn't know about, got out of prison. 
Calling a sorority fat and ugly, in their earshot.
Going to the ER after trying to beat up at a roommate for taking one mountain dew to many. 
Pouring lysol on roommates bed because it smells.

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